Feb 27th, 2026 Friday Cloudy
I got to meet two nice girls at work. One of them acted as my mentor – helping me onboard, introducing me to other colleagues, and answering all my questions, especially ones that I felt awkward posing to my manager.
I felt grateful that I found a “big sister”, even though she is technically younger than me. Just as I finally oriented myself, she decided to leave the company for a better position.
Luckily, she lives in the same city (roughly speaking) as me, so before departure, we exchanged contacts and promised to stay in touch. After a couple of months’ coordination, we finally fixed a date for me to visit her (and her kitties). I shared that with the other girl, who is still my coworker. I know they are game buddies and talk regularly.
“It is interesting that now we are older, we must really plan to hang out. When we are younger, we just do it without any prior planning.” she commented.
That, might be a key difference in friendship between adults and teenagers(?).
In childhood, friends emerge organically – usually our classmates, neighbors, club members, etc. that are conveniently grouped together and brought together without any effort on our side. Before the era of cellphones, we just knew that we would see these pals at a specific time and location; now we could maintain a connection via messaging and social media as well.
We also seemed to have abundant time outside of class. If we felt like chatting and playing after that swimming lesson, we simply did it.
However, adulthood brings numerous responsibilities, and few of us have the luxury to set aside a few blank hours just in case a friend shows up at our door unexpectedly. Moreover, even people in the same household may have drastically different schedules, so if we desire uninterrupted quality time with someone, preparation is critical.
If something is truly important to you, you make time for it.
Wait, but no one can literally “make” time, right? No matter how we wish otherwise, the number of hours in our day remains constant. Spending one period on chores means NOT spending the same period on something else.
Almost everything has an opportunity cost of time. Deciding how to live one’s life is essentially deciding how to allocate and manage every minute of one’s life.
As kids, most, if not all, of the arrangements were already set for us (often by parents). All we needed to do is to participate and reap the benefits. In the case we truly wanted another thing, other people would make it happen (e.g. who does the majority of work for a family trip? A birthday party?). Because the load was not on us, we could hope for anything.
Nevertheless, as grown-ups, we are the ones to lay out the canvas, and paint our own days. Putting someone on our calendar under no obligation is a clear announcement: at this moment, you are the highest priority in the world. I will make time for you.