Once in a life time

Mar 27^th 2022 Sunday Sunny

Do you like traveling? And do you plan everything on a trip ahead of time?

If you are like me, the answer is yes, and yes.

From my parents, I inherited the inclination and competence to prepare for everything ahead of time if possible. This tendency carries through workplace, personal life, and of course, leisure traveling as well. I would do trip planning to the extent that after all the preparation, I can get around and act completely like a local person in an area that I have never been to, because I know my route, my schedule, and so many details of my destination that I can easily pass as a local (I have been approached by Japanese people in Japan to ask for directions during my first visit to Kyoto!).

Nevertheless, some of the fun of traveling comes unplanned.

My husband and I took a short spring trip to Kansas city last weekend for some overdue relaxation. He has been there a few years ago for a conference, and had fond memories of the barbecue (that seems to be the number one thing that people associate with Kansas city 😛 ). He thought it would be a great experience if we could visit the famous barbecue restaurant that he went to and order their signature barbecue, dining in to enjoy the smoky smell.

But I am not THAT enthusiastic about barbecue (we already ordered barbecue take-out on Saturday from another highly reviewed local joint). And we are still in a pandemic, so dining in does not seem wise yet, especially in a popular restaurant. Maybe next time, I told him.

So on Sunday we spent the whole day absorbed in arts in the vastly spacious Nelson-Atkins museum of art. My legs were sore from walking and standing all day, and I craved for a matcha latte. Google map brought us to the nearest starbucks – unfortunately their matcha was sold out. Worried that I would be grumpy for the rest of the day, my husband suggested trying a different location – problem solved!

The weather was unseasonably nice, with temperature in the 60s to 70s and a spring breeze – a perfect day for some hanging out in a park. How lucky that one was within walking distance! Naturally we en routed there. Much to our surprise, on our way we passed by that famous barbecue restaurant! Better still, they happened to have outdoor patio seating open thanks to the sweet weather. We were able to get a table right away, and we happily savored the famous Kansas city barbecue, watching the sunset in the backdrop of the city skylight.

As a result, without planning to be there, we “encountered” this dining experience. We both knew that the chance that we would ever visit Kansas city is low, and even if we do come again, we are unlikely to come to the same restaurant twice (the food was good but not exceptionally delicious, in my opinion). Moreover, many unexpected factors jointly made this experience possible: if I got my matcha in the first starbucks, we would not have gone to that neighborhood and find the restaurant; if the weather was not as favorable, the outdoor dining would not be open (we later learned that there was disagreement among the restaurant managers regarding that, since some managers preferred not to open the patio because the outdoor dining season has not yet started), etc. This could truly be a “once in a life time” dining experience.

In Japanese, there is a phrase/idiom “ichi-go ichi-e”, used in tea ceremony to describe the awareness that this current moment is unrepeatable in one’s life, thus should be cherished to the utmost. In theory this could apply to every moment in life, since no two moments can be exactly the same – people come and go, environments change, and relationships keep forming, evolving and disolving. However, it is during traveling that this feeling of “unrepeatable moments” is the most salient. After all, we rarely visit the same place twice. Even if we do, the second time will never be exactly the same as the first one – nothing stands still in the fast-moving society nowadays. Your favorite cafe may be closed. Your favorite barista may have left the job. Your favorite dish may be unavailable or the taste may change. New spots pop up. New people come. New dishes become trendy.

The memory though, will never fade. The laughter we shared, the stories we told, and the time we spent together, will remain part of us as we pack up and embark on a new journey. The realization that this very moment will never happen again makes it all the more precious and worth appreciating. It is because of all these unrepeatable moments that our life is unique and irreplaceable.

“Ichi-go ichi-e”. I wonder what the next encounter would be like?